Fear and other four letter words
Don't worry, no profanity here. Just want to grab your attention and hold it for 37 seconds. Start counting.
Fear is okay. ('Okay" is also a four letter word)
Its okay to feel fear. ('Feel' is a four letter word too)
Fear is normal and everyone experiences it. What's not normal is... when you feel fear and choose to sit on the couch watching a movie or any other version of the world going by, instead of doing what you really want, because when you see the fear, you tend to see the whole bad picture all at once.
Life experiences should be tasted and chewed on, not swallowed whole. As yummy as apple pie sounds, can you imagine trying to eat the whole pie without tasting it and chewing smaller bites? Nobody does that. But with fear, when it comes to our big dreams and favorite pastimes, that's exactly what we try to do. We try to do the whole experience. Stop doing that! With that image in mind, you should be able to do a small piece of what you want right away, in spite of the fear.
If you're a horseback rider with fear, don't ride, go lean over his or her back from the mounting block for a week or so and enjoy that small bite. Savor it, taste it, remember it, for heaven's sake, don't ride off into the sunset yet. If you're a public speaker with fear, don't schedule a big event, do a live video on Facebook and don't tell anyone, rebuild your confidence in small organic bites. If you're a writer who doesn't write because the thought of a new book is overwhelming, don't write a new book. Write a blog post. One day, your piled up blog posts will be a book in the making.
Bottom line. Feel the fear and do it anyway. Do a small part of it. Taste it. Chew it. Live it. Love it.
('Live' and 'love' are also four letter words)
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"Take just one bite at a time, okay...." - Don Jessop, Mastery Horsemanship
3 Responses
Terri
Love this, thankyou, reminder of taking ourselves back to basics when we’re not confident 💜
Patty
WOW!! Perfect timing as always!! I did the above exercise with 2 of my horses.
This week for the first time in year…… I have actually RIDDEN 2 times one f them!! Don I can’t Thank You enough for all your support, not only with the horses, but your support mentality and emotionally with my journey!! You are the best!!
Patty
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Stella Brake
December 09, 2020
Thankyou! this is reminding me where Im at. Fear is the biggest thing robbing me of my ride. And so is the impatience of the Yard owner who has designs on my beautiful Horse. I have a great relationship with my Boy on the Ground. Its fantastic. So Id like to transfer it to the saddle. I do ‘sat, pat, chat, and relax’ stop myself and hold him in that moment relax and then walk on again. Gradually regaining confidence. then the Yard owner comes in and negative comments. People especially women are horrid, can be, when they are so spiteful and gossipy. Puts your confidence down and theykeep asking questions and i dont like it. How do youcope with pressures from others who do well riding they seem to think your horse is in need of moving on. My relationship is fantastic with my horse, and hes well and sweet in himself. People get ideas because they are a better rider than you that they can take away your pleasure. This is whats happening right now on my Yard of 39 horses that im at.
People look down on you because you are not competing. and Mock you when you are doing amazing things in hand. My horse will do anything for me on the ground. hes a strikingly beautiful dark bay 16.3hh boy. catches the eye and there he is honed in on me when we do ground work. Its amazing. he looks after me in the saddle, careful. I need to find my confidence again and not doubt myself or concern myself telling others to back away from my joy with him. Because we are now doing well. Im walking the arena and dressage plans….walk trot test. we are doing this together. Thats huge for me. Im loving my journey. its a pity the women around were so nasty at times they talk to one another with opinionated views. Some have shot their horse that went lame, others sold and moved on Im sticking with my boy because we have such an incredible bond.
Why cant they just leave good things alone.